Repeat After Me – “I am HERE for YOU.”

10th September – Suicide Prevention Day

Dear friends and family, 10th September – every year – is celebrated as a Suicide Prevention Day. Today, first time ever, I will share a few things on somewhat related to that and give all of you a ‘thought’ to think about.

1st Attack

In 2016, around November December, I got my first ever anxiety attack. Those who loved me and didn’t know about it then, please don’t worry. It was not as serious as the term “Anxiety Attack” sounds! But yes, those few days were clumsy and confusing. I didn’t know what was happening to me as everything seems OKAY in my life. There was nothing to complain about – really!!!

So, I became silent. YES… ME – SHAILEE became silent. (Can you imagine?) I stopped agreeing or disagreeing on anything, I stopped talking/arguing, and reduced all interactions, even with the parents, friends, and even with the boyfriend (then) – who is now my husband!

I was clueless, but fortunately, my neighbor and one of my closest friends Prateeksha, was there! She is a brilliant psychologist, and so I talked with her. Then eventually, I spoke with her parents and my parents as well. (I will not share that story here as today my purpose is different!) So after a few days, I was fine.

Illustration by Feel.Share.Grow

2nd Attack

Exactly after 3 years, in 2019 November – December, I again felt supremely anxious. This time I knew what was happening! So, I didn’t stop talking about it or with anyone. I asked my best friends to come and meet me in person – one by one. I hugged, cried a little (without any particular reason, but IT’S OKAY!) and felt good. After a few days, I was fine again!

What’s Next?

So, from the last few days, I am anxious again! (Maybe because there’s so much going around in and outside of India, and no matter how much we try, we can’t ignore such facts.) But this time, one thing is different! I know myself and my anxiety issues more than the last two times. SOOO, I can handle it more maturely.

But still, I didn’t stop speaking about it!!! I talk with my friends, parents, husband/in-laws, and even with the strangers that YES, I FEEL ANXIOUS SOMETIMES. You can see how openly I am writing about it as well.

So, what am I trying to tell you here?

  1. I just got the mild anxiety attacks, and still, I felt numb and clueless. IMAGINE A PERSON HAVING SEVERE ANXIETY/DEPRESSION! What they must be going through every single day!!! I am literally getting goosebumps writing about it.
  2. Those who are getting such shitty feelings often – PLEASE SPEAK/TALK IT OUT. Please believe that you are normal, and IT IS OKAY to talk about your mind and heart. GET HELP! (Text/call me if you feel that I can help you. Just remember – no one is going to judge you – and even if they do – YOUR LIFE IS MORE PRECIOUS THAN THEIR USELESS JUDGEMENTS. Feel.Share.Grow.
  3. Those who DON’T have anxiety issues, consider yourself LUCKY. So now, as you are lucky, PLEASE HELP OTHERS. Reach out to the people who have such problems. Observe their “off” behaviors. Ask them if they are alright. If they don’t want to answer, JUST BE THERE! They will surely tell you whenever they feel that you are genuinely with them.
  4. You may think that your parents/spouse/family will be worried if you’ll open up about your mental health – but trust me – they will not! They know you and love you more than you to yourself. Also, they are stronger than the elephant when it comes to your health. Please don’t be over-wise and TALK!
Illustration by Feel.Share.Grow

Guys, we can never imagine how someone feels/think when they are NOT in their RIGHT STATE OF MIND.

STOP BEING PATHETIC AND START BEING EMPATHETIC. Spread love, joy, laughter, care, and positivity. PLEASE!!! Maybe this way, we can really save at least one life – unknowingly.

“You have not lived the best life until you have done something for someone who can never repay you.” 🙂 

– Shailee’s Leekhavat

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